Just a Quiet Day

Today was exactly what Maxim and I needed; just a quiet day at the flat. I had prayed about learning to relax more in these last days. Although I feel responsible to take necessary steps to finish up in Ukraine, I don't want to forget that the fact that I am here at all for an adoption is all God's doing. This is not about me "getting the job done"; it's about witnessing the Almighty complete wHat He began. Daniel and I talked together before we even got here about how blessed we felt that things leading up to our travel had gone so smoothly. We knew this could not have happened without God's hand on the process. I am remembering that when things are challenging, I also have to acknowledge God's hand in it all. If I never saw any difficulty, if I never felt helpless along the way, I would not have the same opportunity to see His strength. So the bumps along the way can either be looked at as infuriating irritations or the perfect window of time for learning new lessons.

I used to read the Psalms and wonder about how in one he wrote joyfully and full of praise, and in the next was perplexed or angy or downhearted in some way. I wondered about all those ups and downs. As I have read through the Psalms again on this trip, I understand this rollercoaster better. It is the expression of one who is dealing with all of life, transparently, while constantly trying to see God in all of it and pursue a relationship with Him. I hope that as I share things in the blog, I come across with even a sliver of that, rather than a wishy-washy complaining heart.

By the way, I got a phone call at about one o'clock yesterday afternoon that the "paper boots" are ready. Hooray!

This time in Kiev has actually been valuable in many ways I cannot deny and I don't want to forget. Here with the Belokha family, Maxim has had the opportunity, in his native language, to know a grandpa and grandma figure for the first time. He is going to love my parents and Daniel's parents and I trust his relationship with thiem will be beautifully blessed, but I am so thankful that as soon as we left Kherson, Maxim could be welcomed by people who have the grandparent heart toward him. He has made quite a connection with them. Part of me is a little apprehensive about what it will be like when he realizes they are not going to America with him, yet I think it's been a delight too for him to receive that kind of affection right away.

Valentina is an excellent cook of traditional Ukrainian foods, which for the most part consist of ingredients any frugal American household would also use, but in different combinations. For example, she makes a very tasty creamy layered salad with grated beets, carrots, chopped boiled eggs , tuna and mayonaisse. It is delicious. She also prepares pirogi which many of you may already be familiaк with. They are basically a bread dough filled with anything from a vegetable mixture to apples and ricotta-type cheese. Soups of all sorts too. Maxim and I have not gone hungry. In the morning and afternoon, I generally prepare breakfast and lunch for he and I with ingredients I have puchased (although we are frequently offered more of whatever was served the previous evening) and then we share the evening meal together with the family. Conversations have been very pleasant and interesting. The general culture and also the personal stories of this particular family are very humbling. Very few Americans truly know hardship like many have experienced in Ukraine even in recent years. We are, for the most part, at least a couple of generations removed from having $3.00 to get through the week. This family knows what that is like. They have been there, they know it's possible to get by on very little and still be generous. Their home now is small but beautiful. They have worked very hard and waited a long time for each thing of value they own. They patiently search for the best quality they can afford. And they are quick to extend hospitality (in our case, they immediately opened their home to us, having no idea how long we would stay). They do charge a minimal fee, but we feel like the most welcome guests. God definitely set us in this place for this time. May Maxim and I be used to somehow bless them as they have been used to bless us.

For those of you who know my email and would like to write, ask any questions, etc., feel free. I check my email every day.

Last night at the grocery store, I found a soft (except for the plastic head) Super Man doll. Maxim has really enjoyed that today. He has called it everything from Super Man to Maxim to Papa, depending on the game he is playing in his imagination at the moment. I have a great shot of him holding Super Man proudly. He likes to make sure Super Man has proper opportunity to use the bathroom.

Today was a tough day as far as Maxim's stubborn side. Overall, this side hardly ever comes out, thankfully, but he was pretty hard-headed today. Trying to balance the fact that he is six years old with the fact that he is the size of a three year old, with a lot of catching up to do in many ways, I have been having him take a nap after lunch every day. It gives him needed rest and also gives me and our hosts some quiet time. With the exception of the first days we had him in Kherson, Maxim has been really good about taking a nap each day. Today, however, he put up quite a fight. He was what I call quietly stubborn. Playing around on his bed, sitting up over and over, telling me no and complaining. None of it loud at all, but he was just being quietly insistently defiant. So I explained to him that I was not going to leave the room, I would be right there. Usually, knowing this is enough for him to sleep. Not today.
So I massaged his back for awhile. He played around poking me and blinking his eyes really fast, the kinds of things I remember doing when I was little and did not want to have to go to sleep and miss anything. I explained to Maxim that we would play after he had a little sleep and he just became more stubborn. In the end, I told him that I was not going to argue with him but that since he had been disobedient today, certain things that he really enjoys (namely three different containers of treats that were given to him, which need to be limited anyway) would not be available today, tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. This was the simplу way I could think of to show him that disobedience
has lasting consequences. The next days will be the test in whether or not he really gets it. If I had just recognized that a nap was not necessary today, that would be one thing, but I feel I have to nip outright defiance immediately.

Maxim has a wonderful personality overall. So much potential. Often generous without being asked, happy when he wakes up, willing to keep trying when his speech or some other action is corrected by me or our hosts, etc. Like any little boy, he also has a lot to learn. I can say it is an incredible blessing to be a part of it. It will stretch all of us exactly as the Father wills.