Introducing Our Little Boy

Maxim climbing on the playground equipment.

Yesterday, we had our second visit with Maxim. A beautiful, sunny (although cold) day so we bundled up and headed for the orphanage playground. We can go anywhere with Maxim on the premises. As we walked past the different things, I would ask him (ZDEES?) "Here?", to see what he wanted to do. He wanted to go straight to the tallest climbing equipment with a big slide. As soon as his wheelchair was at the base, he hoisted himself out and headed up the steep steps. No small feat when your upper body is where your strength is.

We had a great time playing with him. He loved having one of us at the top of the slide with him and sending the truck we had given him down to the other person, followed by himself. We would catch him at the bottom and start over. He enjoyed just playing in the leaves, loading them in his little truck, and eating the yogurt and juice we brought for him (fresh produce is rare for the children here).

For now, we are not allowed to post facial shots on the internet. When we have the judge's decree, the adoption will be final and we'll post a picture head on so you can really get to know Maxim.

As we visited yesterday, a child psychologist accompanied us. It was her job not to influence our time with Maxim but to document how the attachment is going. While we were all together on the playground, we showed Maxim a little photo album of our family. He looked at Daniel's picture, said "Papa" and kissed it. Then he said Mama when he saw me and kissed my photo. So sweet.

The psychologist let us know at the end of our visit that she sees a good connection between us and Maxim. He feels safe and even tried to copy English words as we played.

We noticed quite a difference between Maxim's reaction to us the first day and then yesterday. When we arrived yesterday, he was in class and as soon as we walked in, he began to chatter about Papa and Mama, and looking back over his shoulder at us, smiling. He always tells us not to leave.

At one point, Maxim needed to eat his lunch, so we sat with him at the table. His meal was cooked cabbage, potatoes with just a little bit of meat, soup, a drink that smelled similar to coffee and black bread. He didn't eat all of it by any means. We thought it was a lot for a little child and it was definitely more than was served to another child nearby. Maybe for appearances?

Before he could eat, Maxim needed to go and wash his hands. Igor, our facilitator, who carefully reminds us about every little thing, said "Now, Jenna, don't forget that his sleeves must be rolled up when he washes his hands". I said, "Ya Mama", (I'm Mama), just meaning that I a mother and I won't forget such a thing. Igor thought I meant "I'm the Mama, back off." We ended up having a nice laugh about it though, after we both apologized, and Igor is not as pushy now.

After we left the orphanage yesterday, we realized that the truck we gave Maxim was back in my bag. He and I had been playing with everything in there (he loved the retractable tape measure) and he had put the truck in there. We feel bad because he will be looking for it and probably wondering if we are coming back, but no visits are allowed on Sundays. Actually, they made an exception for us to even visit Saturday.

We really do appreciate Igor's help. We could never accomplish this task without assistance. He took us on a tour this morning; a very old church (dedicated in 1806 to Catherine the Great) on the grounds of a castle, and through a park with many monuments. He is quite a history buff and could tell us a lot about the area, especially during WWII.

This area has a very different feel as far as safety. In Kiev, a huge city, we felt fairly comfortable walking together and looking for things, even after dark, as long as lots of other people were out too. Here in Kherson, Igor is always telling us to be back at the apartment before dark, to not speak very loud to each other when we're out walking, and even Igor shys away from police. While we toured the park today, we looked across and saw the police had stopped by Igor's car and were looking it over. In the states, we'd probably walk right over and ask what's going on. Today, Igor just wanted to sort of roam in the park a little longer until the police were gone. Interesting. Ukraine is still a police state with a great deal of corruption, so we do have to be careful, but it feels like no one trusts each other much.