The Road We Are On - No Looking Back

Close Up of Maxim's Feet (Pre-Treatment)


First Set of Casts

We are off and running with the casts, as you know. I thought it might be good to show some pictures at the beginning of the journey so you can see the progress. It is an interesting road trying to make the most of the knowledge and skill that those in the medical community have been blessed with by God, while striving to put our focus most fully on God's perfect healing hand.
Of course, we desire that Maxim's feet, knees and hips just be miraculously set into place by the Great Physician Himself. We have heard testimonies of parents whose children were born with deformities, and after anointing and prayer, miraculous healing occurred. We desire that when additional x-rays are taken in the next month or so, the pictures will show changes for which Dr. Reinhart cannot possibly take credit. Not because we don't like her or appreciate her, but because we want all of the glory to go to God.

Maxim is actually into his second set of casts now. He chose green this time. He has slept great every night since they were put on. When the first ones were taken off on Wednesday morning, he was petrified. The tool that is used looks like an actual power saw, although the "cutting" of the cast is actually accomplished by vibration rather than slicing. Maxim was not convinced of this at first and the noise was scary as well. However, the nurse put the "blade" on her own palm while the machine was on to show Maxim that it did not hurt her. He cried loudly when she started working on the casts until I got right in his face with a smile on my face and asked him if the machine was hurting him. His eyes got big with surprise as he realized it actually wasn't painful at all. Then the process became simply intriguing to him.
After the fiberglass coating and plaster were removed, he really enjoyed removing the cotton cushioning fuzz underneath. For some reason he loves to repeat the word "fuzz".

There was a bit of a reality check for Maxim as he realized a short time later that I had been right in telling him there would be more casts after the first came off. There was some pain involved as his feet were manipulated into an even more correct position and the casting began again. However, I could tell he was glad to choose which color he would like this time and he even volunteered that next time he would like yellow. Some tears rolled out of his eyes as the doctor casted him, but he was very patient and cooperative. Such a good boy.

Helping Mom Make Bread - He Was So Proud to Say He Did It With Mom

Maxim really loves to be a part of what we are doing in the kitchen, and other chores as well. During school time, he usually stays on the task, although sometimes his mind wanders and he gets a little goofy. Not unlike his brother Joel when he was that same age. Joel used to hang upside down off the edge of the couch when I was reading to the kids, and I would wonder if he was even listening. Then later he would repeat back to me what I had been teaching. Not that I think the kids shouldn't be taught to sit up and sit still at appropriate times, but there are times that we have to recognize different learning styles and the way each child is wired. They don't have to all fit into the same box to still be learning productively. Anyway, Maxim has already finished one of his workbooks, learning some eye hand coordination working through several pages of mazes. His other workbooks are dot-to-dots and beginning counting and number recognition. Other than these, which take maybe forty-five minutes each day, put together, he is learning by watching us and hearing us repeat things over and over. All through the day, he asks us what different things are and whether or not they are his. And lately, he has been repeating the names of different items without asking us what they are, and also naming the color of various things in the house, in English. Sometimes if I revert to Russian to name something or explain it, he will repeat it back to me in English.



Imitating Papa Praying At Mealtime

This whole process of experiencing adoption has been an amazing tool in God's hands to set us thinking about our family life from this day forward. Our time with our teens to continue instilling a strong foundation is slipping by quickly and training Maxim is a tremendous privilege and responsibility at the same time as well. It has provoked a lot of thought, prayer and conversation at our house about what would glorify God in our family. The other night, Daniel called a family meeting and asked each of us to tell what we felt we could be praying for that would truly honor God. In the end, all but Maxim had given an answer. Brina wrote out the list on an index card for each one of us, so we won't forget to pray for the things that God brought to our minds that night. Joel suggested praying for wisdom, however God wants to give it. Daniel said we should be praying that we will always be people of integrity. Bravery to do the right thing was on Brina's heart. My mind went right away to wanting God to put us exactly where He wants us. Cyan wanted to pray that we will know how to praise God in everything we do.
It was really powerful to hear what God had put on everyone's mind and as we continue to pray for these things now, because we are learning to want to honor God first, won't it be interesting to watch for the fruits. Not what we can get get get because we "said just the right words", as if God is our genie, but because a little more each day, we want to be counted among the righteous and pray in His will.

Casting

Sorry to take so long in updating. I was hoping to post some photos alongside the latest news but have misplace a necessary cable. Oh well, I will do my best to add those as soon as possible.

On Wednesday the 18th, I took Maxim to Grand Rapids for his first visit with the specialists. Dr. Donnie Reinhart is in charge of his care on the road ahead but is part of a team who will review all of the x-rays and work together in deciding the best approaches for helping Maxim.

Daniel and I knew before we even went to Ukraine that Maxim has club feet and issues of some sort with his hips. Obviously, through the x-rays, we have a much more detailed vision of Maxim's condition.

First of all, the doctor could see, with the x-rays and scars on Maxim's feet and heel-cord areas, that surgery was attempted at some point in Ukraine but was not successful. We had noticed some, but not all, of the scars and wondered about this.
Dr. Reinhart says that the techniques used were probably done with the best of intentions but without the knowledge available in more advanced medical communities, and therefore was of no benefit to Maxim. It is actually now to Maxim's disadvantage because it created scar tissue that our local doctors will have to work through/around at some point later this year.

None of our translated medical history papers from Ukraine noted any surgeries so we will never know whether certain papers were never transferred from the baby house to the orphanage or if certain details were "conveniently left out" of Maxim's history by the people we dealt with in Ukraine. Either one is a real possibility but it's okay if we never know the answer. It is enough to just start from what we know now and look to the Great Physician for wisdom, strength, and healing for Maxim.

After seeing the x-rays taken, Dr. Reinhart spelled out for me that Maxim has severe club feet, a condition in both knees causing certain parts to be pushed to the outer side of each one, a slightly dislocated left hip, and a severely dislocated and mal-formed right hip.

Dr. Reinhart explained that the best approach with the club feet is to cast Maxim's feet repeatedly into progressively more correct position, and then do surgery after as much as possible has been accomplished through the casting manipulation. Because there was a time spot available that same day, Daniel and I decided to go ahead and let them start the casting process on Wednesday. So Maxim is now in full leg casts and will have them taken off and reapplied in a slightly different position every Wednesday morning for the next four weeks at least. During these weeks, Dr. Reinhart and the rest of the team will be evaluating how Maxim's feet are progressing and the maximum amount of correction that can be made for Maxim's feet, knees and hips under one anesthesia when surgery is done later this spring.

As expected, Maxim had trouble sleeping very well the first few nights. Uncomfortable from the casts themselves and likely experiencing some muscle spasms due to his feet being forced into a little different position. Wednesday night I put him on the living room couch and slept on the floor next to him. He woke up every half hour to hour, hurting. I had explained to him that the casts would be on for many days and then the doctor would take them off and build new ones. Several times, Maxim asked if maybe he could just have the casts on for one day and I had to explain again that many days were necessary. Thursday night, we put him in his usual bottom bunk in the room he shares with Joel and when I woke up on Friday I realized I had not heard a sound out of him during the night. I figured he must have rested well. However, Joel told me Maxim had once again wakened several times during the night and Joel, not wanting to disturb Daniel and I, had comforted Maxim over and over through the night. I felt bad that the boys didn't sleep well, but really proud of Joel for being so thoughtful to Daniel and I, and encouraging to Maxim. I felt like that was such a mark of maturity in Joel. He is really growing up. Certainly, imperfect like all of us, but some pleasant evidence of taking the initiative on being more responsible. Good job, Joel!

Friday and Saturday nights, Maxim slept so much better. During the days, he has been pretty much himself and quite the trouper. The casts are heavy, of course, so this slows him down but the fact that they are full casts in a slightly bent position (properly bent about twenty degrees so he can still sit easily) is actually allowing him to be pretty active. He won't be enjoying boats in the bathtub for awhile but still has a good time scooting around to gently "wrestle" or play tag.

We have really noticed an increase over the last week in how many English words Maxim remembers and repeats. Toilet paper, shampoo, dishwasher, dancing (he loves to watch Brina and Cyan practice), car, van, church, "Come on, Ninny" (calling our dog, Sydney), etc. I keep telling myself I need to get more of his voice on video and/or our digital voice recorder. It will be so neat to listen to later.

The Continuing Saga - Life Moves On

Our Fabulous Four - Don't They Look Like They've Always Been Together?

As February races by, it is hard to believe Maxim has been home with us for over a month already. At the same time, it seems like so much longer. I think of everything our family has experienced in the last six months and it is mind boggling to believe it all fit into that short time period. Some recaps and updates are definitely in order.

My dad, who you may remember was diagnosed last spring with prostate cancer, joined us in Tennessee last fall, with my mom, to celebrate Sukkot. He seemed to be doing so well until just a few weeks before the trip. However, by the time they flew to Nashville from Seattle, things were not looking good at all. He was extremely weak and declining the entire week we were together, and besides praying fervently that Mom would be able to get back home with him all right for a surgery scheduled soon after, we were pondering whether we would see him again at all after that trip.

Of course, it was during that same trip that we received the exciting news from Bethany Christian Services that it was time to head for Ukraine and bring Maxim home.

Also adding to the unique rollercoaster of last year was our realization last fall that Daniel's youngest sister Carolanne had health problems that were snowballing downhill and we thought we might lose her too.

As we took off for Ukraine, my dad had come through his surgery well and was recovering at home, and Carolanne had finally been admitted to a hospital for much needed water, nutrients, medicine and just plain rest. It was still really stressful to leave the country at that point, but things were at least looking up.

Well, long story short, my dad is doing so well that when I call home, he is sometimes doing such things as working up on the roof of their house, or out kayaking which he so enjoys. He and mom were able to go on a trip to Mexico in January that Dad won through his local Kiwanis Club. The doctors say there is no need to do radiation as was expected at this point, and he doesn't need to go back in now for a few months. Thank You, Most High Father!

Carolanne received a diagnosis of ulcerative colitis and, through medicines, steroids and experimenting with different nutritional approaches, is doing much better. Still some bad times (don't stop praying) yet when I got home last month with Maxim, she had finished a beautiful knitted blanket just for him and presented us with some wonderful homemade jellies as well. I felt like our Carolanne is really coming back. Praise to the LORD the Almighty!

Maxim is doing soooo well. He went to the dentist again this last week. The first time was just a general checkup. This time, they sanded the malformed brown enamel on his left front tooth and paved over it with a tooth colored filling. It looks very nice. I had thought we would not do this for awhile as it would probably be looked at by our insurance as cosmetic. But they will cover the majority so we went for it. Maxim was thrilled when I pulled into the dentist parking lot and he realized where we were going again. He had to have the mask over his nose for the nitrous oxide gas (I think I'm namingthat correctly) but when the dentist, her assistant and I reassured him, he seemed to totally trust us and relaxed. After we were finished, he went to the treasure chest once again, this time choosing a rather ugly pink plastic pig finger puppet with giant googly eyes. He insisted that it is Papa. Yikes!

Some of the great things we are seeing in Maxim these days are that he is continually picking up and appropriate English words. No full sentences yet but naming things accurately, like shampoo, toilet paper and dishwasher. He counts items accurately in English up to twelve. Actually up to twenty but with some mispronunciations after twelve. He remembers various people's names accurately. No matter where we have been on a particular day, when we leave a place in the van, Maxim almost always waves and shouts "Bye bye, thank you!" Wrestling with Daniel and Joel is still a highlight of any day and this passed week, I introduced him to bread making. We have a chef hat the older kids were given years ago and Maxim got to where that and help me put all the ingredients into the bread machine. He was very proud when I told Daniel later that Maxim made the bread, but noticed that I had mentioned myself in the sentence. Maxim was quick to say "and Mama".

Once in awhile, there are moments of temper, but short lived. I have seen this come up primarily when he has to go to bed before the other kids (not every night but if their "teen" activities/responsibilites have them up later than usual), has a mistake pointed out to him in his workbook during school time (he is really doing well but I think he just so wants to get everything right the first time), and occasionaly when he has something I ask him to share (like the Cheezit crackers from Sabbath school; every little one should know that sharing one cracker with each of their siblings is not going to kill them). This week we reached another milestone; Maxim decided he does like salad after all. A LOT of salad. Once he took the chance to eat a bite that had a little ranch dressing on it, that was it. There is no stopping him now.

On Wednesday this week (the 18th), we go to Grand Rapids with Maxim for a two hour (minimum) exam and consultation with the specialists regarding what the necessary treatments will be for his feet and legs. Please pray for peace of mind on Maxim's part and wise counsel from those who see him.

Yesterday, I really enjoyed getting back on track with some things that were on hold for several months or more. The girls and I were able to grate a whole bunch of soap that didn't turn out properly last summer, melt it down and produce about fifty new bars of several different scents.
We enjoyed experimenting with various combinations of essential oils and I told Daniel that he is our official "company nose". I have almost no sense of smell and he has an extremely sensitive sense of smell, so he gets the last say in whether a scent is just right. Anyway, it will be neat to see some good product come out of what looked lost last year.

I made sourdough starter for the first time a week and a half ago, and yesterday Brina used some to make our first sourdough bread. The loaves are on the small side (think 8" round artisan bread) but really delicious.

Something about being home again has me praying and pondering what it is to be a virtuous woman; truly a woman who lives a Christ-like life in front of family, friends and community 24/7. No shred of hypocrisy. I realize this is not what Daniel and the older kids have seen consistently in me. For them, and now for Maxim, but most of all for the glory of the Father, I have to lay down in the palm of His hand and let Christ truly live in me. Some would say I'm too hard on myself about that and/or trying to be "good enough" in and of myself. But then I look at Christ's prayer and promise in John that after He died and ascended to Heaven, there would be others who came after Him who would "do even greater". That is not a blasphemous thought. It is the exciting promise of our King who knows what He wants to do in and through each of us, and that most of us have much longer physical lives ahead of us than He did on Earth, in which to be tools of the Father's in the physical realm. If we get to the end of a day and realized we have failed in a particular way, physically and/or spiritually, it's a good thing to honestly self-examine (asking the Father to let us see ourselves the way He does) and crave doing better the next day. I figure, after letting go of one tiny piece of our lives and seeing God bring the beautiful fruit of adopting Maxim out of that surrender, I want to come to the place where I am obedient in even more of what I know of His ways; willing to let go of even more so there is room for more fruit.

Thoughts From Cyan, Maxim's Oldest Sister

When Mom and Dad were in Ukraine, I stayed at Grandpa and Grandma's house. I feel like my relationship with them and with God grew. I had the chance to spend time with Naomi and Nathan, my two youngest cousins, as well.

Just to be with Grandma and Grandpa every day seemed to be good. I have cerebral palsy and sometimes it takes longer for me to talk and to speak clearly. When I was at Grandma and Grandpa's home for seven weeks straight, Grandma asked me if I really desire people to understand me. My Aunt Shannon asked this too. Of course, I said yes. I want people to understand me clearly. So I tried to slow down and over the time, Grandma and Grandpa could understand me much better. This was a blessing that came out of having to stay with them so long.

One day, my mom and my dad emailed me from Ukraine and Dad said "read your Bible every day and pray every day". Before, I knew that God is there but I thought that my parents sort of believed in God for me. Now I know that's not right. While Mom and Dad were gone, I had to trust that they were going to be okay and I had to start believing that they were okay and I would be fine too, even though we were not together. God helped me stay peaceful about that.

I believe I have more confidence in God and a better relationship with Grandma and Grandpa now.

Having a new brother, Maxim, has been really neat. Sometimes it's hard because he does not know very much English yet, but he can tell us already if he needs to use the bathroom or he is thirsty or something like that. My favorite thing about Maxim is that certain things are difficult for both of us. Even though he is a lot younger than me, we can listen to each other and I can help him.

At first, Maxim did not like the vacuum or our dog, Sydney. Now, he often wants to know where Sydney is so he can pet her. With the vacuum, it is noisy of course, but now Maxim likes to help Mom vacuum by holding the hose down on the floor and sucking up stuff like dog hair.

Maxim looooooooves pizza. Yesterday, we went to the grocery store and Mom bought pizza. Right away, when we went to the van, Maxim wanted to know where the pizza was. Same at the house. Where's the pizza? Today, at the church potluck, he chattered away about pizza, although there was none served. I would say, without a doubt, pizza is Maxim's favorite food so far. He absolutely does not like green salad, although he is willing to eat some of the same vegies by themselves.

Dentist and Details

This past week, Maxim saw our family dentist for the first time. It turns out he has quite a unique mouth. Remember, Maxim is six years old (will turn 7 in July) but is currently the size of a three-year-old. However, the dentist says he has the teeth of an eight-year-old (even one molar that would typically be present until age 11). All set in a little boy mouth. For the most part, everything looks healthy, with the exception of one cavity just beginning and a malformation of the enamel on one front tooth, causing a brown stain. They say he will be a candidate for early orthodontics in the next couple of years, but really our bank account will be the deciding factor in that.

Maxim loved the dentist experience. I had tried to prepare ahead of time for some anxiety on his part but he showed none at all. The dentist and her assistant were great about showing Maxim each instrument and it's sound and motion before actually placing them in his mouth. He was so cooperative and of course happy to retrieve a toy treasure as a reward after his appointment was finished.

On Sabbath, Daniel and I had the opportunity to share the details of our adoption story in a one hour presentation to our congregation. Although we struggled to put it all in a nutshell and there is so much that will just have to be shared in individual conversations as God leads, there were different people who were moved by the account and I can see that God is already using what He has done for us to speak into other lives. Not necessarily about adoption specifically, but to reveal that He is Almighty and will faithfully walk us all the way through whatever He has asked us to do. I have felt from the beginning that whatever He accomplishes in our household is not just for us, but meant to ripple out to others. I can see those fruits already developing, not because of us, but just because He is at work.